Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Facebook Commentary: The People Under the Stairs

Yeah... the People Under the Stairs. Check it out.

Carl Towns Fuck this. Facebook commentary. The People Under the Stairs!
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns Universal logo shows up. Always good title logos for them.

Carl Towns For those who don't know, this movie reinvented the crazy white people thriller.
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns The film stars Brandon Adams whose been in Mighty Ducks, Sandlot, and Moesha. What does he do now? Apparently a rapper. Yeah... time to quit dat shit and get back to acting.
-Pedro Sambrano Who was he in Moesha?
-Carl Towns Aaron
-Pedro Sambrano Aaron, I'm trying to remember who that was. Was that her
-Carl Towns Moesha's boyfriend (Season 4)-Thank you wikipedia.

Carl Towns Aaaah shit! Ving Rhames! Looking thugged out like always.
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns This film was done by Wes Craven who of course created Nightmare on Elm Street. it also has Kelly Jo Minter who actually survived through Nightmare on Elm Street 5.

Carl Towns In the credits the two crazy white people are usually credited first as man/dad and woman/mom. Only the "dad" has an actual name.

Carl Towns Ving Rhames about to smack a hoe. And maybe a punk kid.
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns Treasure map found at a liquor store? Really Wes? realism has completely been thrown out the window.

Carl Towns A little child abuse about to happen here on A. J. Langer's character Alice. Who was also on My So-Called life filmed at my Alma Mater, San Pedro High School!

Carl Towns Bad girls burn in hell-Dad/Man

Carl Towns Wes Craven was inspired to write this film after seeing a real-life news
story about parents who locked their children up inside their house,
never allowing them outside.

Carl Towns Wes Craven chose Wendy Robie and Everett McGill to play the parts of Mommy and Daddy after seeing them play husband and wife on the TV series, "Twin Peaks" (1990).

Carl Towns Sorry boy, I don't little n*****s into my house-Mom/Womans thoughts

Carl Towns The main characters name, Fool. He's a fool for getting into this mess of trouble.

Carl Towns
Time for some breaking and entering!

Carl Towns That dogs trying to tear up Ving!

Carl Towns No doubt that dog is a racist.
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns Maybe you're too stupid for this kind of work. or maybe your too chickenshit-Ving Rhames on the art of breaking in and stealing from white folks.
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.
-Pedro Sambrano This sounds like one of the greatest movies ever made.
-Carl Towns it is. pure entertainment
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns Never, ever, enter the basement of a crazy white family. Never.

Carl Towns Told you not to go into the basement.

Carl Towns Back on topic: Follow that white girl!

Carl Towns Turkey Brain? Come on Wes, that some bad jive talk.
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns Electrified front door + black teen = good times. I love this movie.
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns Okay, the dogs not racist. He just doesn't like Ving Rhames.

Carl Towns Ving and Fool play hide and go seek with a crazy white man brandishing a high caliber gun in a house thats built like a fortress. This is what life would have been like if the south had won
the Civil War.

Carl Towns Crazy looking person in the walls. Strange white girl in a dress who ain't seen a brotha before. Fool is in some serious shit.

Carl Towns Universal Studios Florida incorporated some of the film's plot as well as the house into a haunted house several times for their annual Halloween Horror Nights

Carl Towns White man in S&M gear shooting holes in the wall with a shotgun trying to get that "Roach"

Carl Towns If you really want me to do a commentary on a film with evil white folks, I could do Rosewood. but I might not talk to my mom for the rest of the day after watching that.

Carl Towns okay, the dog is racist. last time he just went for Rhames because he was the biggest of the two.
Poor Rhames, you died a punk.

Carl Towns Roach just sent that dog a slide. Damn, I'd like to go down a slide. It looks fun. Damn this getting older BS.

Carl Towns Speak no evil, see no evil, hear no evil!

Carl Towns
These white people are crazy. Making the black kid clean the body. Giving the Alice girl a boiling hot bath after washing the blood stains.

Carl Towns what a nice guy. feeding all those creepy people under the stairs some fresh n***o.

Carl Towns poor Roach, died. but at least he helped out Fool and showed him those valuable coins he was breaking in to find.

Carl Towns The black kid taking it to the white man. Making his escape with the white girl. Wow. Some sort of metaphor.
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns The racist dog is finally dead.
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns the black kid got out with some valuable coins. white girl didn't leave with him. the end of the film?
-Pedro Sambrano I hope so, run dude, run!!!

Carl Towns I really think people who describe this as a comedy or even a horror comedy are missing the point - it's a classic fairy/folk tale, right down to the theme of the kid having to earn manhood and a "real name" by doing a heroic deed.

Carl Towns Wicked step-parents, hidden treasure (gold coins, even!), creepy house with secret passages and monsters in the basement, captive maiden to be rescued, innocent villagers held in slavery by evil (land)lords - it's all there! I know this could be said of a lot of fantasy/horror films, but this one seems to be more clearly ...derived than most. Loved it-review i read on imdb

Carl Towns Your sister is speaking smarts. Don't go back. DON"T GO BACK N***A! ITS A TRAP! LEAVE THE WHITE GIRLS ALONE!
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.
-Pedro Sambrano If only OJ and Tiger Woods would have learned this lesson.

Carl Towns I told you not to go back Fool. Now you're fighting S&M Man and his partner Crazy White Woman.
-Pedro Sambrano Damn

Carl Towns Damn. Man bobby trapped their escape route.

Carl Towns Either this is role playing, or they are smacking and choking each other.

Carl Towns while i was gone, we had some action. now fool is staring down the barrel of a shotgun. wait-knock at the door might save him... its his sister! here to save the day!

Carl Towns coming up on the end of the flick.
"where'd that crazy heffer go?"
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns Woman was trying to kill Alice but the people popped out and saved her. those guys really don't like these people. makes you wonder why they didn't just band together and break out earlier. PLOT HOLES....

Carl Towns Alice with the knife to the gut. The people with the frenzy. Game over for you bitch.
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns Now the final battle. Man vs. Black teenager. Who is going to win?
-Pedro Sambrano I know who I'm rootin' for.

Carl Towns Shotgun vs. Dynamite. The scene, the Treasury.
"I don't want to kill you but I will. I don't like you much anyway."
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns Alice and Fool, winners. The people under the stairs are now free to wander the streets, looking like mutant bastards and scaring your kids. Truly, a happy ending.
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns Plus free money for the po' folks. Yay!
-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns Thats it. Later.

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